有的女生（A）问另一个女生（B）假如你老公外面有外遇，你会怎样做？
女生（B）就回答说: “我会关一只眼，开一只眼.”
女生（A）好奇的问：“为什么呢？”
女生（B）就回答说她想瞄准一点，对她先生开枪。
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
怎样分辨口袋里所带几支笔的人
假如有个人的衣袋里有插着笔，
一支笔 --〉 代表有学问的人
两支笔 --〉 代表是教师
三支笔 --〉 代表是教授
四支笔 --〉 代表是博士
五支笔 --〉 代表是卖笔的人
Monday, May 26, 2008
After Victory, Singapore to Reclaim Land All the Way to Pedra Branca
Following the International Court of Justice’s judgment, the Gahmen is looking into the feasibility of reclaiming land all the way from Sentosa to Pedra Branca.
The International Court of Justice ended a long-running dispute between Singapore and Malaysia over three maritime features (or as we normal non-lawyer people say, “piles of rocks in the sea”) last week.
The ICJ ruled that Pedra Branca, the site of the Horsburgh Lighthouse, was owned by Singapore, while a small outcropping named Middle Rocks went to Malaysia, and the last (mostly submerged) feature called South Ledge had to be split, though the Court declined to say exactly how, since both Singapore and Malaysia neh ask them to do it.
“The important thing is we got back the big prize, which is Pedra Branca,” said Ministry of Law spokesman Chin Ah Heng. “I mean, a win is a win, even though really, when you think about it, hor, we got Pedra Branca not because of any real official ownership transfer, but because Malaysia was si peh slack.”
Now that the ownership of Pedra Branca has been established, Mr. Chin said, Singapore can proceed with its development plans for the football-field sized territory.
“We think the Horsburgh Lighthouse needs a makeover to reflect the changing face of Singapore,” he said. “So we want to make it the Horsburgh Lighthouse cum casi… sorry, sorry, integrated resort. The top floor where the light is can be a nightclub or revolving restaurant.”
To make transport to the Horsburgh IR easy for high rollers, the Ministry of Territorial Development hopes to reclaim a long strip of land, to be developed as an expressway all the way to Pedra Branca. “We hope to connect Sentosa and Marina to Pedra Branca, just like the way the little islets of Florida Keys are joined by a highway in the US,” said Mr. Chin. “To help finance the construction of this expressway, we will be establishing ERP gantries along its entire way.”
Malaysia has reacted, unsurprisingly, with alarm at this prospect, and not to be outdone, has said they too want to connect Middle Rocks with the nearest spot on their mainland, which is Tanjong Penyusop, also known as Point Romania.
“The Malaysians can do whatever they want with their territory,” said Mr. Chin. “But they cannot have a straight connection from Point Romania to Middle Rocks, because it would cross our territorial waters. So they’d have to go around Pedra Branca. But they should be okay with that. Malaysians seem to like the idea of building curvy bridges to nowhere.”
Both countries maintain that they are willing to negotiate but Malaysia has said they might not agree to submit disputes to the ICJ again.
“Halamak,” said Malaysian Deputy Vice Foreign Minister Datuk Mohd Rugi bin Pulau. “This form of Western adjudication is biased against us. We should choose a form of dispute resolution that is more advantageous to Malaysia. Like a penalty shoot out.”
Meanwhile in Singapore, there have been small rumblings of opposition to the proposed highway to Pedra Brance, from an unlikely source: the Singapore Police Force.
“Our manpower resources are already strapped,” said Deputy Assistant Superintendent Boh Lang Leow. “We really don’t need an additional 13 sq. km of territory for us to search for Mat Alamak.”
The International Court of Justice ended a long-running dispute between Singapore and Malaysia over three maritime features (or as we normal non-lawyer people say, “piles of rocks in the sea”) last week.
The ICJ ruled that Pedra Branca, the site of the Horsburgh Lighthouse, was owned by Singapore, while a small outcropping named Middle Rocks went to Malaysia, and the last (mostly submerged) feature called South Ledge had to be split, though the Court declined to say exactly how, since both Singapore and Malaysia neh ask them to do it.
“The important thing is we got back the big prize, which is Pedra Branca,” said Ministry of Law spokesman Chin Ah Heng. “I mean, a win is a win, even though really, when you think about it, hor, we got Pedra Branca not because of any real official ownership transfer, but because Malaysia was si peh slack.”
Now that the ownership of Pedra Branca has been established, Mr. Chin said, Singapore can proceed with its development plans for the football-field sized territory.
“We think the Horsburgh Lighthouse needs a makeover to reflect the changing face of Singapore,” he said. “So we want to make it the Horsburgh Lighthouse cum casi… sorry, sorry, integrated resort. The top floor where the light is can be a nightclub or revolving restaurant.”
To make transport to the Horsburgh IR easy for high rollers, the Ministry of Territorial Development hopes to reclaim a long strip of land, to be developed as an expressway all the way to Pedra Branca. “We hope to connect Sentosa and Marina to Pedra Branca, just like the way the little islets of Florida Keys are joined by a highway in the US,” said Mr. Chin. “To help finance the construction of this expressway, we will be establishing ERP gantries along its entire way.”
Malaysia has reacted, unsurprisingly, with alarm at this prospect, and not to be outdone, has said they too want to connect Middle Rocks with the nearest spot on their mainland, which is Tanjong Penyusop, also known as Point Romania.
“The Malaysians can do whatever they want with their territory,” said Mr. Chin. “But they cannot have a straight connection from Point Romania to Middle Rocks, because it would cross our territorial waters. So they’d have to go around Pedra Branca. But they should be okay with that. Malaysians seem to like the idea of building curvy bridges to nowhere.”
Both countries maintain that they are willing to negotiate but Malaysia has said they might not agree to submit disputes to the ICJ again.
“Halamak,” said Malaysian Deputy Vice Foreign Minister Datuk Mohd Rugi bin Pulau. “This form of Western adjudication is biased against us. We should choose a form of dispute resolution that is more advantageous to Malaysia. Like a penalty shoot out.”
Meanwhile in Singapore, there have been small rumblings of opposition to the proposed highway to Pedra Brance, from an unlikely source: the Singapore Police Force.
“Our manpower resources are already strapped,” said Deputy Assistant Superintendent Boh Lang Leow. “We really don’t need an additional 13 sq. km of territory for us to search for Mat Alamak.”
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